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Crystal Clear, Razor Sharp |
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ABOUT ME |
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Glass Girl |
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| Wednesday, November 12, 2008 | |
Mother, may I? |
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Today she crossed the line. I had to get up early and go to a last-minute cram group for biology, so I left before Julie got up. When I came back a little later, she went through the usual, “When did you leave? What did you do?” questions. Then she really pissed me off. “Did you even brush your teeth before you left?” she asked. “I didn’t hear you when you woke up.” Say what?!?! It may seem stupid and insignificant, but it’s the principle of the thing. Even if I hadn’t, what business of hers is it? She’s not my keeper. No one asked her to be, and frankly I don’t need it. Like I said, it’s stupid, but it ate at me all day long. Tonight I was hanging some laundry and decided I was going to attempt to ignore my petty irritation. I attempted friendly small talk and gossip about the day, but she continued to be surly. She wasn’t even studying, just texting on her cell phone and occasionally glancing at her notes. Finally, I snapped. “I hate it when you do homework,” I said. “Oh? Why is that?” she replied in about the same tone. “Because the first thing you do when you study is shove a 2x4 up your ass,” I barked. She glared. I shouldn’t have said that, but I did. Then it came out that a girl in our apartment had told her I was so ruffled about the toothbrush thing. She attempted an apology, but I wasn’t very receptive. I bristled and put up every emotional defense I could. I was angry, and I reveled in it. If nothing else it got me out of the lethargy and loneliness I have harbored just beneath the surface for two days now. I don’t understand why I feel this way, it’s irrational and impossible to name. I just feel SAD, and I want to feel sad, I seem to be encouraging myself to feel sad. But the anger felt good too. She’s going home next week, and then I’ll have a little time to myself. All I have to do is make it till then. |
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| Posted by Glass Girl at 10:58PM | |